Berserk

I was watching Berserk the animation and this character said something in his dreams before he turned into the devil, which has been lingering in my mind for a few days now. Could it be that I was so captivated by the show and its dramatic plot or because that the intense agitative violence of the animation really speaks out to me. Ah.....The eternal battle between good and evil, the strong and the weak, the innocent and the guilty. Perhaps there is some affinity between those words being chanted and my inner devil.....

(Soft creeping sound of volin in the background with the echos of water dripping)

Darkness, so pure not a single ray of light can find its way to me
How long have I soaked in this darkness
Eternity?
Or times I think just a moment
I feel nothing.....
As though there were nothing
And I am floating in it
I have preserved my sanity,
have I not?
Or did I lose it somewhere?
And yet, in this darkness and its fantasies
One thing is still clear in my mind

(Lightning sound effect)

That alone like lightning splitting through the darkness
He appeared so vividly in my mind
Over and over again it swells and sinks like the waves of a tsunami
Hatred, friendship, jealously, indignation, emptiness, love, sorrow
They all come together in a single great storm

(Constant screaming of pain and agony in the background)

Driving a stake through my mind
Holding my consciousness together
The one who cast me into this darkness
He is now my anchor
This man whose life was once in my hands
When did I fall under your control?
I see you now
Radiating so brilliantly it blinds me

(Music stops)


Good show, though the beginning could be a bit draggy. It has been ten years since its first release to the market and the story plot is still on going. Hope the author find time to concentrate on the ending soon. The suspense is killing me.

Pride, Stubbornness And Injustice

Sometimes we hold on too dearly to things that we felt precious to us. Be it for our pride, our selfishness or our moral values, everyone has their own circumference of belief that they would try to protect and process. That belief is sacred to us and because of such tension and daily anxiety, once this fragile thin wall of religion is shattered, most of us will crumpled to our knees and our world will come crashing in. It could be our habit of wanting to be the first in everything, the way we talk, the way we walk, our favorite seat in the car; the bus, the office, the upbringing of our offspring, the ten o'clock and 3 o'clock tea break, the expectance of total silence in the cinema...etc....etc...etc...Anything that disrupt our daily routine, things or people preventing us from doing what we want, even the betrayal of someone close to us is classified under our circumference of belief isn't it.

From small things like missing your coffee in the morning which in turn makes you feel crappy, (For coffee addicts like me) to missing that bus or Mrt you took everyday so you won't be late for work. Being struck in the traffic when you are in a hurry even. What about being backstab by someone you know and trust. Won't you feel terrible? If we worry bout what others think all the time, how are we able to advance forward in life? Have to take care of yourself before you take care of others.

Therefore, I have stopped bothering bout what others think and says of me. Ignoring even those who had defamed and tried to bring me down. I trust my own conscience. My true friends and love ones trust me too, and that is all that matters. Sometimes you just wonder, have those who condemned you ever reflected on their own lives? It seems to me that they are much worse off and is trying subconsciously to degrade others so their egoistic self may feel better.

Doesn't bother me nowadays as their mouth are bonded on their face. Can't do much about that, can you? No matter how filthy it is, I'm not gonna rinse it for them cos even the best dentist in the world can't help with their rotting gums now. And that puny excuses for a pea brain so small and narrow in their hollow skull sometimes makes you want to knock on their head and ask them the famous movie series dialog [Back to the future] : " Hello...anybody home??!! "

It is time we learned to let go. Loosening the tension and just take life a step at a time. Let us not be overly stubborn on trivial matters and just breathe. When is the last time you people breathed? Seriously not breathing to survive which you people are doing now but really...just inhale deeply and exhale to relax. Try it now with heart. Feel that? Taste that? That's life, which is all around us. (Don't take into account all the pollutants in the atmosphere lah) The life which god created and wants us to experience. If you're like me, once a while late at night go to the seaside or just go downstairs and look around you. Feel around you. BREATHE around you and all the worries in the world would just vanish like a song lost in the night. (At least for that moment lah) Not because the problem went away.....but because you just replenish your spent and tired soul with enough energy and mojo to tackle any problems like a snap of your fingers.

Get it? No? Well I leave you with a quote I find exceptionally uplifting though I have forgotten who said it:

"In the darkest hour of the twilight zone. Lies the seed of the brightest tomorrow”

















Breathing in the life around me and relaxing........

Kanna Shoot

I'm too numb to feel a thing. Think I'll just continue with enjoying my beer. Tell me when you people are done scratching my back.

Ha-ha. I am certain that there are many others like me in the same situation. Our back is so full of arrows that we can't feel anything anymore. However, we will not succumb without a fight. Whatever that won't kill us only make us stronger. As long as those jackasses do not step over our personal boundaries we will suck in our guts and “lun”. However, if they are so foolish enough to try my limits, be prepared to take the consequences cos I will not stop until I see blood on my hands. Once I bite, I don't let go.

In addition, I'm saving all those lovely arrows, knifes, whatever and returning it to you when I'm done sharpening the edges.

Rude Teens

Saw a bunch of young pricks the other day, probably in secondary school occupying the playground and cursing freely. There is a young toddler girl who came along with her dad, wanting to play with the slide and guess what those teens did? They tease her and bang the slide so that she can't climb up the swing. Fuck man! These are the teens of today. You could witness such similar display of attitude anywhere in Singapore. Where is the love? Moreover, all in front of the father. The father should have told them off even though if they were such a bunch of airheads, it won't do much help but then IT IS your kid being bullied man! Where is your responsibility as a father? He just carried his child who is crying loudly by now and walk away. Perhaps it is the best thing to do.

They were squatting there blabbering bout girls and how the woman of their dreams are not with them but with some other “loser”. (I am guessing that they were thinking more with their pea-dicks than their pea-brains. What do they know bout love anyway from the way they are behaving? ) Know why she isn't with you? Cause you are a bunch of assholes that's why! It is an act of cowardliness to only bully those weaker than yourself.

But hey, if it was MY baby girl being berated like that, no way in hell am I'm gonna just walk away. I gonna walk all over your skinny ass man!If you just leave things as it is, won't all those assholes out there get out of control soon? Do we wait until they committed some major crime which landed them in jail do we say, they deserved it? Retribution? And just smile and be glad that they are finally being punished?

In this age, adults are more afraid of teens than the other way around or should I say... unnecessary trouble. Saw another young kid in primary school being handcuff by police and led away. In addition, he has long brown hair. Does government education institution even allow dyed hair now? What on earth is the world becoming? If these are the future leaders of Singapore, we are fucked.

The Day After

Just five word to describe what I am experiencing now.
Pain, pain and more pain!
The agonizing piercing really kicks in after the effect of the anesthetic had faded away. My head is still swirling about and feeling a bit giddy. Can't smile, laugh, eat, brush.....basically anything that will cause my facial vascular muscle to move. Guess I have to be expressionless like a manikin for these few days. My wound is still slightly bleeding. I asked for additional bandages from a nurse with a filipino accent yesterday and was rejected. Is the hospital bandages in low supplies or it is too expensive to hand out excess bandages to patients? Sucks man. Good thing I've kept extra bandages around for emergency usages.

Need to get back to recuperating now. Haven't been able to laze around for a long time, though I much rather be at work. Sleeping is just a waste of time.
It is exactly this sort of thinking that is causing trouble with my health.
Got to change my attitude.

Day Surgery

I will be going for surgery to remove a lipoma growth on my forehead later on. Been having it for three years. Due to work and other commitments, I wasn't able to schedule the operation earlier but now I am finally able to get rid of it.

A bit worried and not sure what to expect. It was cause by work related injury and during that time, I wasn't bothered to apply Chinese medical oil treatment on it. Therefore, from a blue black, it ballooned up to become a lipoma. Guess I should have paid more attention to taking care of myself huh? Now I'm gonna be left with a scar on my forehead.

Hope the scar won't be too thick and visible. Would not want to be too “manly” right?!

Pissed off!

Wasn't planning to post anything tonight but feeling damn piss right now. Some asshole just bang non-stop on my front door and ran off. I mean, come on man! If you have the guts to play this sort of prank, have the balls to stay there when I open my door. What is the freaking time now??!! My family doesn't have to sleep is it?! What the fuck do you achieved by doing such childish thing?! If anyone tries to be funny with my family, I will not let them off so easily if I apprehend them. May karma get you sooner and reincarnate you into a pig!!

I have a small clue to who is behind that ridiculous trick. There aren't many kids in my block and they should be asleep by now. If I am correct and I know I am correct, it's the annoying neighbor living upstairs. He's 34 years old by the way but have the mentally of a 10 years old. And no, he is NOT mentally challenged. He is just plain childish!!! Feeding off his parents. I wondered why his wife married him. I am not criticizing his wife but her background is also a bit...well...let us just say un-normal. (I shall comment no more) He tried to rip off money from my folks a couple of time and I told him off. After that, he has been doing moronic pranks on my family. Once I almost punch him for trying to “borrow” money from me, (Extort is more like it. Cannot believe it! This is not the 80's whereby you extort money from school kids who are too afraid to do anything. I wonder how many schoolchildren have fallen into his hands cos I personally saw him doing it once) and he run off to his parents to complain and backlash me! I look at the parents in the most sympathy stare I can conjure and they look away in shame. Who wouldn't? If I have “old kids” like that I also pai seh man! Wah lau. I can call you uncle liao lay! Anyway, he wants to "borrow" a dollar! The world is full of much less fortunate people whom I am donating to every month and yet here you are, healthy and just plain lazy to get off your butt and work and tried to act "gangster" when I declined. Come on, if your neighbor who live in the same block just got out the lift and try to borrow a dollar from you, you'll lend him meh? Just go back up home to take your money lah, You fat lazy bastard!! Don't try to play "numbers" with me; I WAS a member long ago. Not like those ah beng and ah lian "numbers" that you're playing now. I have actually slashed someone before, have you?!! Cannot make it man!

And his dad is also another joker! Always singing with his home entertainment karaoke set. Wah lau ai! I rather listened to Michael Bolton and his undistinguishable voice than to listen to him!

I need to get out of this place fast! However, HDB keep rejecting my balloting application and only release news of the latest walk-in-selections while I am at work. By the time I got there, the queue number already exceed the numbers of flats on offer. Sian man.

News This Week

The hot topic of the week in the blogger world is the case whereby two people were charged under the Sedition Act with making racist remarks; Twenty-five-year-old Nicholas Lim Yew faces two charges, posted racist remarks on the general discussion forum of http://www.doggiesite.com and 27-year-old Benjamin Koh Song Huat faces three charges, posted his comments on another website, http://www.upsaid.com.
Read Here.

Didn't read their entries yet and don't planned to. So what else is new? Who in heaven's name have never been subjected to some form of racism before? Some pour out those smack-right-in-your-face offensive sentiments while others curse and swear in their heart or behind your back. Do the latter mean the person is a coward who doesn't dare to criticize you upfront? Of course not, it is just common sense not to get yourself into trouble.
( Unless they went so far across the line that the line is a dot to them. We have to protect ourselves and the ones we cared about at times of injustice right? Letting others stepping onto you all the time is just plain stupid! )
Look what the two “gentlemen” has gotten into by being vocal. ( At least in blog and forum format ) Singaporean by whole ( Including me ) is sometimes too lazy to concern themselves physically and mentally with unnecessary work or troublesome after effect of voicing out their dissatisfaction. That is why forums and blogs is a good venue for complaining ( As usual ) and the word “anonymous” is widely used by smart people. Ha-ha.

Of course lah, I am not applauding the actions of those two jokers. I myself have endured situations whereby I was the object of racism. Whether in my homeland or overseas. Twice I was in Australia for overseas detachment and twice I was “attack” on two separate occasions. Don't worry, we just exchanges vocal vulgarities, as they didn't dare to get physical upon seeing my bulging muscle.
( Ya right, ha-ha maybe it is my fluent non-stop cursing that frightened them away. I was like Stephen chow in [Lawyer Lawyer] ranting continuously without giving them chances to rebuke)

Just to show, that racist exist everywhere, whether it is in Europe and other westernize countries or in Asia itself. It would be impossible to try to the change the world but that doesn't mean we should not keep trying. The conflict between the blacks and whites. The Nazi races and the rest of the world. Heck, racist exist even between populations of the same race! Aiyo, really sick of it man! Why can't we all just live and let live. What ever happened to the ‘holy’ phrase: “Love everyone like thou brothers and sister”? Give peace a chance.

Ultimately, it is just human or should I say the nature of all living creatures to assault one another in one fashion or the other. The lion and its prey, the invader and the defender, the cats and the dogs, the dolphin and the shark, man and woman...etc....etc....etc. Haiz.... no matter how peaceful the era, there is always some sort of struggle going on. ( Which makes life exciting ) We simply have to prosecute one another, whether vocally, in written text ( Posted entries in this case ) or taking up arms. Like I said, so what else is new?

Cannot tahan man

The other day I posted a short comment on Mr Brown entry regarding two people being charged for racist content on their blog and in a forum :

Wah lau. There is really no freedom of speech in singapore. Though I don't support their actions on the racist comments but like this a bit too much man.

Posted by: Mr Lee Sep 12, 2005 2:22:51 PM

In return, I got this reply from someone:

good. :)

and i wish people made the distinction between freedom of speech and freedom-to-be-downright-disrespectful to another human being.

Posted by: anantya Sep 12, 2005 3:46:22 PM

Obviously, referring me to right? Since I was first to bring out the [freedom of speech] crap. Aiyo, as if nobody knew the differences.
Refer to my previous post on my views of freedom here.
Anyway, I replied with this:

Can't believe I was actually “reprimanded” for my comments. Ha ha. My goodness, people nowadays are really sensitive bout words and going in-depth unnecessary in between the line. Like a person seeking a fortune teller and only wished to hear all the good news. There is a difference between making a stand and trying to change the world, which is impossible.

Oh well, anyway I was never bothered bout skin colour and crappy stuff like that since it only limits the growth of a person's mind and horizon. To me, whatever colours you are born with, you're also just a person waiting for his/her time to come. That's all. Thus, I have a habit of letting unessential opinions pass through my ears and just continue with my thoughts. What's important is the truth. Think those two should have mentioned that particular Malay as a person instead of his/her race. After all not every bad seeds in a particular religion, represent the entire community. Guess they were too over powered by wrath that they didn't think straight. Now they're paying the price for it.

Posted by: Mr Lee Sep 13, 2005 6:49:43 AM

Come on people, there is enough conflict as it is. (I am referring to the blogging world here) So please don't add fuel to the fire. As entertaining as it is, the excitement and curiosity will soon die down after a while since it is the same bullshit over and over and over again. Two of the fervid disputes now are the collision between Rockson fans and ephraim and the rivalry between Xiaxue and Xialanxue.

Just click on their comment icon and see for yourself. Enough is enough lah. Let us just cast aside the indifferences and let them live their own lives. In addition, please do not be so quick to pass judgments and launch your catapult at the slightest possible hint that somebody may be stepping on your shoes. Like twisting the words of others and implying stuff that they (or myself) didn't mean.

Anyway, it's your mouth and opinions lah. Unless I am the tyrant ruler of the country, I couldn't do anything to stop you right? (Killing is an option but really not worth it man. Not to mention stupid in this day and age) So do what you will with responsibility and I will follow suit.

No Escaping

Why I always kanna those advertising comments ah? First, there is spam letters, and then there is spam mails, and now spam comments? I didn't see any of it in other people's comments window. These are a few examples.

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Noticed the difference in time the comments are posted?

To those who is posting as an individual and a blogger themselves, thanks and fuck man! I really appreciate the additional information like car buying tips and loans. Keep them coming. To those who are posting the comments from a sales company or as a salesman/woman, thanks and fuck also. Pls lah, I don't have the money to surge on your products at the moment. How do they manage to post it onto my blog by the way? I only told three person of my blog and yet they managed to “find” me. The cyber world is scary indeed. Even the blogging world is not free from advertisements.

Nostalgic

Those entire talk bout BMT, Reservist and ICT somewhat makes me nostalgic. Therefore, I scan through my hard disk in search of photos of my BMT days. You may think I am crazy but I really enjoyed my time during that period. Shiok what, carrying 30kg food pack running around here and there, dashing up the 85' degrees angle of the god dammed hill slope. Being ordered to prone down in the muddy pile where an anthill resides while we remained stagnant. Bearing with the itch and pain when tens and hundreds of those little inserts crawled up onto your body and each took a little bite out of you.
(Cannot blame them lah, I was the one covering up their exit route. Instinct of the wild to fight and survive. Love it man!)
Oh yes, not to mentioned those drenching rainly morning hours where we were force to wake up at 5am (If you managed to sleep at all) for 5 BX. My legs were still asleep when we start to run along that blasted 2 km route every morning. What's not to love?!















My section mates in Charlie Coy taken years ago. I sort of lost contact with them. Everyone is busy with their own daily struggle. If you recognize any of them, inform me. However, I highly doubt it since everybody would have kept their hair long and look completely different than they were in this photo.

The obstacles course and that dreadful 24-click road march, wah lau ai! Power man! Never have I felt so much satisfaction after completing the road march in my life. Not even the sweet lure of sex can be used as a near comparison. Yes, it is true, that day I discovered that I was a hardcore, dangerous, psychological, mentally unsound, physically deprived individual with a compelling desire for combat and the comforting aura of the untouched wilderness.

Ultimately, it is not how harsh or cruel the environment we are subjected to that matters. It is the company we kept during those grueling periods that will break or make you. This also applies to the outside world, at your work place, in education institute or family members even. No matter how bad or meaningless life is, having someone you can trust and believe in, watching out for your back really makes the difference. I was fortunate to be in a section of poly grads like myself whereby the rest of my platoon sections were childish, waiting to polish the officers nuts, all talk no action A' level grads. Fuck! Even the sergeants are younger than us and only look after his A' level peers, how to respect them like that?! We were obtruded to do loads of shit work but we were very united like the stitches on a tight jean. Any punishments just take it lor. Push up, sit up, running to touch a stupid distant tree and come back. Only makes us stronger what. An invisible bond formed and the kindred sprit could be felt. (A bit mushy lah I know)














A photo of my buddy and me. If anyone know if he's still alive also inform me. A steady and handsome guy. Only lose to me by a bit.

I was the toilet IC man. Really, learnt that people shit in many creative ways. Some were against flushing. (My goodness, why the fuck may I ask?! Guess their home would REALLY smell like a shit hole) Some only let out a single wave at a time, thus coming back to completed their second or third wave if any. Others always shit onto the squatting platform no matter how big the area of disposal is. Some finished their business so fast like Speedy Gonzales, you wondered have they really done it at all.

I remember a conversation with my BMT mate years ago. It goes something like this lah. So long already how to remember word for word?

A: “You like combat so much go and join commandos lah. Wasted if you don't join lay.”

Me: " Siao ai...you every time pak chiu cheng how come never saved up the sperm and give to the sperm bank for experiment and donation? Every time wash away down the drain wasted right? "

A: " Wah bian ai...dun worry I still got a lot. Can afford to waste. "

Me: " Cock man! Seriously lah it is not bout what you like or dun like, its bout how to survive in S'pore. Go join commandos come out can do what? Resume type in the skill column: Expert in chiong suai and bayonet fighting meh?! You think people dare to employ you ah? Unless you go join hongkong triads then don't say lah. "

A: " Nabei..ya hor. I like to fuck but cannot get a job that pays me to fuck in S'pore. Unless I become gigolo then must serve those lao anutie and lick their toes. Pui! Some more S'pore cannot become porn star. Only ang mo country and japan can. Wait throw me in jail and let gaylos fuck my ka cheung how? "

Me: " Wah kau...You really full of siaow man! "














Waiting for purple rain to come.

Have Faith People

Saw this comment left by a fellow blogger in Rockson blog. Here it is word for word...

Recruit ong said...
yo rockson, about time u talk about cheebye SAF and fcuking waste-time reservist! Oh why u never mention all those super idle jiat liao bee SAF regulars? Must whack them next time, ok?

Those regulars in his unit must have tarkaned this person badly. Yo Ong, regulars are ok lah. Maybe it is that bad in SAF, I wouldn't know. Anyway, it is the management, those officers that are the problem. If they really know how to lead and manage the unit, there wouldn't be any idle person around, would there?

Not bad what. At least during reservist you're paid to lobo dude. Unless of course you belongs to those high alert unit lah, then a bit bo hua. If reservist is really that dreadful, then work your arse off 24-7 like me lah! Start making improvement to your life and aim for the top! After all, not everybody needs to do ICT you know? If you command more than $4000 per month then you're off the hook. (Assuming you're a pes A or B person, not a pes F in which you wouldn't need to do BMT anyway) So more action less talk. Nothing is going to change with just complains mate.

The truth is, I was speechless. Not because there were many others who shared his views. Not even because I, myself, a RSAF regular (ORDing soon), is being portrait as one of those "idle jiat liao bee" type. In fact, I am in one of the most active unit or flight in Singapore as we handle normal sorties including search and rescue mission.
(With so many disastrous events happening these few years, whether natural or fabricated, the workload is really choking me up. I am talking bout real life situations here, not another one of those endless mock exercises.)
However, the main point of concerned is that Singaporean men really have no pride in their defense force. Have the peacetime Starbucks caffeine gone to their head? Do they really think an outbreak of War would never happen again in their lifetime? Do they really think that they are so smart that the current methods of ICT or Military work process are just a waste of time? Alternatively, is the possible solution of just migrating to another country floating in their head, the answer to all their problems? Or is it really the voice of their reckless youth speaking?

If that is really the way people feel, Son-of-a-gun, we might as well just surrender to who ever have the slightest intentions of conquering us right now. I think Malaysia and Indonesia would be more than happy to take over the realm of government. Terrorist would love our global strategical position as centre headquarters because we are in the middle of every damn country or places they wished to mutilate. Then we can all be happy second-class citizens without the need of going through BMT. Youths or adults complaining that their lives pretty much sucks and blows could join the Al Qaeda for suicidal mission cos it is better to end your miserable lives with a big bang than to bother others with your crappy whining. What a waste of two years that would be isn't it? More meaning things could be accomplished in that duration right? Well, more can be accomplished IF there is still a country for us to accomplish it in.

Whatever happened to the phrase: “Take it like a man.” ? (No sexist intended)

Honestly lah, how many of you can really managed to migrate out of Singapore? Money, commitment, connections and lots of other intricate stuff are involved. Nothing is as simple as it seems. Most of you will NEVER make it through the $35,000 annual income benchmark. Sad but true. Even TOILET cleaning needs qualifications!

Imagine Taiwanese actually look down on men who have never been through military training. (It is also compulsory for them by the way.) The military forces in Indonesia hold most of the country political powers. People in China and U.S.A join military school voluntarily. Just waiting, hoping for a chance to participates in the action on the battle front. Shoot some dicks legally, sowing their seeds here and there, playing the hector and tormenting the enemy as in Vietnam, making themselves, their family and country proud of them. Of course, there are also many others with opposing mentality.

Singapore has never really been through its own battle. It is constituted after World War 2. There is no pride and patriotism in the heart of the younger generation cos they were raise by ever-obliging parents, showering them with whatever they desired cos they knew the pain of loses, the pain of regrets and sufferings that the bloodshed of warfare can manifest. Therefore, they threw their love freely and casually to their descendants. (Yet again, there are also exceptions) Kids nowadays are growing up together with McDonalds and KFC, PS2 and DVDs, Disco pubs and KTV, Starbucks and Coffee Bean. I saw a boy making a fuss in Suntec cos his mum won't buy him an action figurine of .....Pokemon!!!

Ai, a bit too much lah! I know men are getting wimpier these days but Come on!!

Untimely, it all boils down to faith. In addition, most importantly, the will and desire to protect what we truly treasured and loved from being taken away from us. Only then perhaps, will they find their reasons for battle.

Caged Mind

I just read Rockson latest entry on his blog. Seems like he's damn pissed off by a guy who wrote in the Straits Times Forum, complaining bout his choices of words and vulgarism "shooting" here and there, faster than you can say "what the...". I'm a bit disappointed really. Isn't blog supposed to be a venue whereby the author could portraits his true intentions and inner thoughts? Not to others but really to himself. Moreover, isn't the comment icon supposed to be used for REAL comments? Like nodding in agreement of the author's entries or disagreeing with it. Not as a personnel attack on the poor chap's pattern of vocal expression man! When has it evolved into the role of a mini forum? Stick to the main issue people.

Anyway, I am truly amazed by the power of people, the power of unity. It just took 41 comments on his entry before somebody posted the critic's blog address. Wah lau eh...really cannot anyhow offend people liao, especially online junkies. (Ya right, as if I really give a fuck as to whether I would provoke you people or not!!) There are nothing really to defend when your views are being questioned. It is after all, our own personnel opinions and it belongs to us alone.

I totally agree with sheltering the teenagers from all the ‘foul’ phrases or so. However, come on man! Have any of you seen the teenagers of today??!! Young small devil pricks. Average age of them having their first sexual encounter is at 12 for guys and 13 for girls.

And the average age of young punk having sex is getting younger and younger!!!

Not to mention their behaviors in the streets. I was a badass kid in my teens but the teens today really take the cake. I shall not explore further in depth except that I totally blame the parents for I believe it is the parent's role to take their children into hand, and any other reasoning such as "I'm too busy working to support the family" or "He/her is beyond my control" is just utterly rubbish and really for convenience. Therefore, do we blame s'pore hectic working lifestyle now, because it keeps us from spending quality time with our family? Do we blame the society for influencing our future generations then? Have we ever considered blaming ourselves?

How do you define 'foul' or vulgar languages anyway? Do saying the word 'fuck' means I am a bad man? Maybe I should say, "Make love" instead.

“Hey fuck you understand!” becomes “Hey make crazy love understand!”

Do screaming out names of human's sex organs causally condemned me as a chow ah beng? (For the info, I am and will always be Ah Lang—ancestors of the now all so popular evolved bengs)
What if I scream out normal human anatomy instead?

"Yo! Smelly armpits, watch where you're going you flabby arms!"
"Darn Hong Kong feet........!"
"Lim peh not happy understand? Your mother bushy eyebrows!"

Hmm..it does sound nicer and inviting. In fact, who is the culprit who first set the standard of vulgarities to features human reproductive organs in the first place? He could be laughing in his grave now for all you know, unable to believe that he managed to somehow revolutionize the cursing world after his time. As En Vogue say in their song ...Free your mind and the rest will follow.

Cheap Shot at Poetry (Or Is It In Fact Really Profound?)

I Have Never...

I have never been alive today that I won't die tomorrow

I have never walked before I crawl

I have never ran before I walk

I have never succeed before I have failed

I have never soared before I have fallen

I have never felt happiness that won't cause me pain

I have never felt sadness before I felt happiness

I have never felt sorrow that won't cause me regrets

I have never felt emptiness before I felt contentment

If I have never felt...why do I still feel?

Enjoy and grasp the meaning behind. If you do, then you would have seen the light after the tunnel.

"Hello"? Hey Reply Lay....

Ever wondered why do people working in office desk job always login to their msn or yahoo messenger account during working hours, first thing in the morning? I mean, they HARDLY ever replied to incoming messages anyway so why bothered at all. Maybe they wanted to "see" who is also online staring into the monitor or perhaps just to display their presences to the rest of group in his/her friends list. Maybe there is comfort in knowing that somebody you know is also out there at that moment using the goddamn computer and suffering. Therefore, actual exchanges of communication are not necessary needed. Guess this is what they meant by those "being there with you too" crap. Moreover, these people are always complaining how busy they are. Which is also crap! (Ya...plus talk cock a bit with colleagues, eat snake a bit here and there, long lunch hour, multiple toilet breaks, forwarding mails to friends...Don't even tell me you never does all this cos that would be a fucking lie!) Then they complain that they have to work overtime cos cannot complete their daily assignments. Hey, wake up your ideas man!

Not that I am comparing but it really irks me to hear them complain how busy they are and how free and lobo I am when they view me online in the afternoon. Fuck! I bet none of you ever starts work at 3am in the morning and came back at 4pm before right? So don't make the mistake of assuming too quickly. 15 hours of sitting at a desk doing "stressful" stuff is hardly anything compares to MY 15 hours of sweats, responsibility and safety of others, giving and complying orders, rushing to class after work, revising till 3am everyday...etc...etc...etc. Funny, thought the guys should understand how it is in the force. Don't tell me them think regulars are more relax than NSF?!! Guess they have all gone soft in the guts or they are from lobo units in the first place.

You can always tell whom your true friends are by who will reply to you on msn. A simple acknowledgement, a short greeting would have sufficed. Of course, there are those who never replied cos they are too "busy". Make sense to you? Takes only 5 seconds to type in 'Hi' and send. Well, can't be bothered anyway. Moreover, these people are going to be parents of kids someday. My goodness. Cannot even imagine how their offspring will turn out! Hope they won't contribute to the growing population of "educated" impolite people. Even some of my uncouth bengs and lians associates will msn me a big “CCB fucker! What are you doing now??!!” whenever they view me online. Hey, it is not the usage of improper words that matters; it is the thought that counts.

Arrogant drivers

Was riding back home on Sunday night in the second lane without any vehicles cruising near me when this jackass sped up from behind, out of nowhere and gives me the "high beam". Expecting me to change lane to give way to him. Really damn tou-lan man!! Fucking retard! Just cos you're driving a car I have to give way to you is it??! Just fucking overtake lah. No other vehicles in sight for the next 2 km. Think you really big shot ah??!! I was riding at 101km/hr, which is already 11 km over the allowable speed limit on the highway therefore I don't quality as hogging the lane. Yet you dare to "high beam" me. Even the police don't do that so what gives you the right. During situations like this, my blood really boils man.

Seen a lot of those so called "road bullies" being reported on the news and in the papers and I was wondering, why go to such extremes. Just take it easy and relax lah. Well now, I know! The sensation just fills you up and before you knows it; your body is subjugated by wrath. A desire to kill. I gave the dickhead the finger and wait for him to overtake me. Can't really see into their cabin due to low street lamps illumination and the coated film the bastard car windows are cover in. Once he had passed me, I high beam all the way directly behind him and horn continuously, trailing him to a max of 160km/hr cos he's trying to shake me off. (Before he turn left abruptly into Jalan Kayu filter lane after he past the divider line. That wussy!) Even though nothing is achieved and it is really a pointless way to get back at someone (Not to mention dangerous) but you don't really tend to bother much when you are infuriated. Let him have a taste of his own medicine. Hey, if it is a fight you want, I will take you on anytime, anywhere. I never run from a fight. Especially from spoilt wankers!! In fact, I longed for it. Sporean men are getting too soft and wimpy. Call me old-fashioned but I always believed in survival of the strongest. Not the ones with a thousand and one cursing or reasons without any blows exchanged.

Bring back the good old days whereby people talk with their fists, not with their mouth. I have seen many police catching those youngsters on sport bike and only a few on cars. Think they had better change their focus of arrest. For all you know, the reason those young bikers speed could be due to the idiotic tub of lard giving them the high beam and harassing them with their stupid horn. This happens to me more than once before. Most taxi and merc drivers are also shit hole of the same breed. May they crash their vehicle and burn in hell. I can only hope!

Yawn...

I was chatting with a friend on msn the other day. Is the term "chatting" even appropriate? If we communicate through webcam that support voice functions ok lah. Cos you do not really "chat" with the other group or person. If so, is "exchanging of informing through typing via internet applications" the political correct term to use? Why are we even allowing ourselves to continue the usages of such terms since everyone is particular about proper English practice in s'pore? In fact, why am I even typing it out on blog??!! It's none of my business anyway. Think I better go and have tea with "Zhou Gong" now.

Wake Up Your Idea

Just hark from a couple of my friend's associate on their comments that blogging is bo liao and a totally waste of time. Well it may be so but, Wah Kua ! So, I guess they must be somebody who is really busy, important and rich then, with lots of social functions to conduct. No? Then they must be an arrogant, lazy and egoistic group of chaps whose narrowly congested mind is that of a walnut. Just because THEY don't do it, doesn't mean it is inutile. For all you hardcore bloggers out there, you will be glad to know that I screw them right up, left down. Gave them a piece of my mind that is so dynamic, they couldn't even handle it.

How many of us are guilty of criticizing others for what they did just cos we don't do it? It is much easier to condemn than to actually venture it ourselves on whether it is feasible or just a waste of time. I just completed a project report that required me 3 days to accomplish before the due deadline with three hours of sleep in between each day. And yet the lecturer scrutinize that I have the easy part of the project. Fuck! You have been teaching for 20 years of course its simple lah. For those of us who is working and trying to cope with studies too, do you think we have the luxury of time on our side? What bout all those tons of research to look up for someone who knows little or nothing at that entire particular subject?! People are getting too ya-ya for their own good.

The reason I am blogging cos it is keeping me sane so I don't slip any of those asshole's throats and dump their body down Kallang River whenever any dipshit pissed me off. Therefore, they really ought to be thankful that they are still alive. Don't push it people .You definitely do not want to make me mad. So unless you're an ultra super rich bugger who can afford your own stuff without living off your folks (Some of these jackasses is still living off their parents. Good grief!) , you have no rights to disparage others and I deemed your comment as obtuse. (I am a realist living in a realistic world) Words of advice...do not criticize others when no one is decrying you. You are not better then anyone of us. If not worse. If you fire your arrows first, I will return the favor with a canon ball.