How We Behave : Women

Most women in this modern society will never be on time for an appointment! (Noticed that I didn't use the word ALL) It is just not in their nature to be early. Women of yester-years like my grandmother and my aunt have never been late for anything as far as I can remember. You can say they are more ‘anxious’ to reach their destination. If the appointment were at 3pm, my grandmother would be up at 7am taking a bath, getting ready and wanting to set off at 10:30am. Of course, this drives my dad crazy and he would tell her that he won't be leaving until 1pm, which still have a two-hour window and asked her to sit and wait. Naturally, she will be sulking her face and complaining to me about my dad until they finally took off for their appointment.

To be fair, woman nowadays occasionally do show up on schedule. However, this only applies depending on certain factors. Like you are close friends meeting up to paint the town red. You're not that close and you do not want the other party to be kept waiting. You have a business meeting or event to attend to together and can't afford to be late. You two are going on a first date and both of you don't want to create a bad impression by being late.

On the other hand, once you two are attached and your status have been upgraded to boyfriend, husband and eventually father of her kids, you can kiss being early for any events or outings goodbye. From then now, woman exist and operates in another dimension where their perception of time is inconsistent from the universal domain around us. They function in a parallel space whereby they're on an average of 15 minutes behind real time. One thing I have learned is that you can make arrangement with them the day before and remind them every hour of the day but they will still be late. You can give them a head start by saying you'll be there to pick them up from work/gathering/their place/meetings in two hours time but they will only start to prepare when you called up again and say you're already at the proposed destination waiting for them!

Why do women always torture men with their unexplainable and mystified behavior? Take shopping for example. Men need a certain item A. We go and purchase the item. We go home. Women THINK of what they THINK they may need. They go to search and see which place has the best bargain for item A. They got distracted with item B, item C, item D along the way. They spend 6 hours browsing through item E to item Z before coming back to item A.
They went home empty-handed feeling satisfied!

Unfortunately, I too am a victim of the postmodern women erratic behavior. Like all the men out there who loved their spouse or soul mate, there is a sentence we frequently say when asked about our opinion to all this sort of irrational and illogical nature by our still single brothers out there: “What to do?!!”

Examples of Commonly faced scenarios:

I'm ready to go.
(What she isn't telling you is: “As soon as I recall if there is anything I left out that needs to be done.” That would give you a good 7-10 minutes before she is out of the house.)

I will be ready in 1 minute.
(Have to find matching shoes to go along with the outfit. Which translate to 15 minutes of waiting time. )

I will be ready in 15 minutes.
(Take out a newspapers cos that normally works out to be 45 minutes of waiting time. She'll be multi-tasking, putting on makeup, watching whatever is on TV during that ' brief ' intervene, playing with the dog, chatting with a friend on the phone or family members.)

I will be ready in 30 minutes.
(If you hear this, I suggest you either finished watching the soccer game on TV, take a shower, have a short nap, slip a cup of coffee or tea at a nearby coffee shop and wait for her call saying she is ready to go!)

Like I said: “What to do?!”